Earned Petting for Puppies

Dog owners often misunderstand their relationship with their dogs. Owners view the relationship through human eyes, instead of relating to their dog in terms that dogs can readily understand. The idea that owners must dominate dogs is a popular concept. However, leadership is more appropriate in the family dog setting.

Earned petting puts the owner in the leadership position in the dog's eyes. Leadership means to guide, direct, influence, or conduct in a non-threatening manner. Although many dog trainers advocate domination of dogs, pet owners feel uncomfortable and are unwilling to do so. Being a good dog leader is a much more enjoyable, and balanced relationship to have with a pet dog whom you love.

Dogs work well for good human leaders. Over thousands of years, man has engineered hundreds of breeds to perform a multitude of tasks. Yet, one constant has remained. Man only continued to breed those dogs that exhibited follower type traits. If a man had to work too hard to control the dog in the necessary task, it adversely affected his ability to survive, and therefore that dog was not bred. Thus, modern dogs, unlike the wolf, have maintained infantile, follower traits, and need humans as leaders. Dogs in the family setting need to see all members of the family, including children, as leaders. This can be accomplished most readily and safely with the earned petting concept.

Earned petting means your dog needs to earn everything he receives from you by performing a simple task for you first. All idle fondling, stroking and free petting must cease. Not only do these actions put your dog on a throne, additionally idle fondling devalues the praise and attention your dog receives for performing a task for you. When your dog nudges you for petting, you need to pleasantly, but firmly ask him to sit. If he sits, he gets petting for 3 to 5 seconds. If he does not sit, he is ignored. You must NOT make him do it. You would be doing all the work, and getting into a war with him. He must WANT to do it for YOU. Remember, he came to you. This is the teachable moment.

Many dog owners panic at this point, envisioning a life of never petting or loving their dog. With earned petting your dog may receive a lot of petting. However, it must all be earned, because your dog wants to work for you. Earned petting allows you to maintain the leadership position by asking your dog to earn the love and attention he asks for, when he asks for it. Dogs whose owners are strong and respected leaders are calm and well-mannered, and are a joy to spend time with.

How it Works

When your dog COMES TO YOU (the teachable moment) and demands that you pet him, or expects you to do something else for him, such as to go out, to be fed, to play, or to go for a walk, he will attempt to get your attention by either nudging you, whining, jumping, pawing, barking, nipping, or pestering you. Calmly ask him to "sit" or "lie down" in a pleasant conversational tone. This assumes your dog knows what the commands "sit" and "lie down" mean. If he does not know these commands, this is an opportunity to teach him. Please ask one of our staff members to go through this training with you. He will do one of four things: he will continue to demand, or he will look at you and act interested, he will comply, or he will walk away.

If he demands again, request him to "sit" or "lie down". If he starts to comply, or acts interested in complying, praise him verbally only until he completes the act, when he complies, pet him for 3 to 5 seconds. If he complies, pet him immediately yet calmly for 3 to 5 seconds. If he doesn't comply or acknowledge your request, ignore him by averting your eyes, and return to your activities. Avoid touching or looking at him. If he walks away, ignore him. He must not have wanted your attention enough to comply with your simply request to "sit". Be sure you do not look at him if he ignores you, you would be giving him attention and supporting the idea that he is leader if you continue to look at him after he has turned away.

Petting is the jackpot in earned petting. Verbal praise encourages him to comply for the jackpot.

Realize the demands are his way of getting what he needs to survive. If you meet his demands on demand you are also telling him in his own language that he is more important than you are. He may not really want your petting; he just wants to know that someone is in the lead. If you do not provide strong leadership, he will assume the uncomfortable role of leader because in a dog's world someone has to be leader. He would prefer you to be the leader. Modern dogs are not engineered for the responsibility of leadership.

When you want to give your dog attention or petting you can. Instead of going to him and fawning over him petting him, call him to you to pet him. You need to call him only once and verbally praise him for even looking at you. Continue your verbal praise until he gets to you. Then pet him. Petting is the jackpot for coming to you. If he ignores you, you must ignore him. If he ignores you he does not yet respect you enough to respond to your request, and petting is not yet valuable enough to work for. Continue on the earned petting protocol, what is rare will become valuable. What is hard to get becomes worth working for. Dogs need leadership, your dog will respond to your leadership when he believes you are serious about it.

Snuggle Time

"Snuggle time" is designed to satisfy dog owner's needs for close contact with their dog while they are establishing themselves as leaders in the dogs eyes. Most often dogs and their owners are both re-learning their relationship to solve some behavior problems that were severe enough that you as a dog owner had the hard choice of changing your relationship with your dog in order to get your dog to become more compliant with acceptable behaviors. Snuggle time is instituted only after 7 days of strict earned petting. When the owner wants snuggle time he needs to decide what will occur, and must be aware of the messages being given to the dog. For example, if the dog invades the owner's space, he is trying to establish a higher rank and snuggle time must not occur. Snuggle time is always done on the owners terms, and the owner initiates snuggle time. You can be on your dog's level on the floor, sitting in a chair or lying down. Call your dog, if he does not come, snuggle time does not occur. When the dog comes, he is asked to "sit" or "lie down". Then you may snuggle your dog, rub the bridge of his nose, put your arms over him, rub his belly, and touch his feet, toe nails, and whisper sweet nothings in his ears. The dog owner is running the show and must invade the dog's space. At no time should the dog be threatened. Snuggle time should last only 5 to 8 minutes, and the dog must not invade the owners space or physically control the owner. If at any time, the dog exhibits bossy behavior, snuggle time is immediately ended and the dog shunned.

Snuggle time is always done in conjunction with the earned petting program and NEVER instituted alone. It is a constructive way for owners to satisfy their emotional needs, yet maintain a leadership position in the dog's eyes. It is the dog we are trying to change, so we must view the world and our actions in his contest. Often, we must change our behavior first to create a lasting change in our dogs.

S. Hall 1994

Any questions regarding "EARNED PETTING" need to be addressed to this office. Earned petting is the panacea for the majority of behavior problems. Adhering to it, assures better behavior overall for all family members.